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Arctic Flame: Declaration
30/04/09 || Daemonomania
Whoa, somebody has been listening to some Judas Priest. However, they missed the most important lesson the Englishmen had* to offer – DON’T SUCK.
To be fair, the band really doesn’t suck at all. They lay down the midpaced power metal competently, have some decent solos, and here and there even a jaded old bastard like me can appreciate the rockin’ groove they hit. Many of the songs have a “Painkiller” feel, but nothing even remotely comes close to that classic’s status. And as well as they play, there is absolutely no reason for most of these songs to last more than five minutes. Dudes ain’t that good.
As is all too common, however, an incredibly lame vocalist queefs all over everyone else’s birthday cake. He’s like the drunk dude at the Priest concert that ceaselessly belt out the choruses to every tune off “Screaming for vengeance”, oblivious to the boos and hisses all around. At very worst, the Jerseyite in question sounds like Billy Corgan on downers. At best, he elicits a pained flinch. Fucking Anselmo’s Halford scream in “Cemetary gates” was better. Ugh. Doesn’t help that the lyrics are inane. Battles, breakups, ball-licking. FIRE this dude. If you ain’t got the sac to do it, get Donald Trump in the rehearsal room. Have that smug asshole remove his hairpiece and shove it down Mr. Dave Lowe’s throat.
On a side note, the copy of their CDR I received said “burn and spread!” on it. How’d they get ahold of my medical records? Doc promised my social disease would stay private! I’m here all week, try the fish. And pray Arctic Flame sees the light and extinguishes the Corgan/Halford’s straight little brother vocalist.
3 power-less metals out of 10.
*Pre-“Nostradildo”, mind you.
- Information
- Released: 2008
- Label: Pure Steel Records
- Website: www.arcticflamemetal.com
- Band
- Dave Lowe: vocals
- Jon Norberg: bass
- Mike Paradine: drums
- Sebastian Garcia: guitars
- Rod Mariani: guitars
- Tracklist
- 01. The Unknown God
- 02. Blind Leads the Blind
- 03. Lords of the Wasteland
- 04. Hammer Down
- 05. Disciples of the Flame
- 06. Desert Moon
- 07. Declaration
- 08. Shadow of a Broken Man
